Charl Chapman

"Lovely fish platter!"

"Mind the red-shirted pool gestapo who take health & safety to mean, "Just don't have fun - it's too dangerous!""

"Camping site fof tents has great views, but just 2 sockets for electric hook-up!"

"Nice pool in the summer! Quiet lane, lovely neighbours who keep an eye out for each other."

"The vending machines are 30% cheaper than the cafés!"

"Toilets are at either end of the train - don't wait until the last minute!"