Brandon Powell

"Puppymonkeybaby strikes again. Free kickstarts? Only hell spawn could pull off a deal like that. Thank you puppymonkeybaby #churchofpuppymonkeybaby"

"This is fun. Climbing is fun. Falling is fun. Not having any food is fun. It's all fun. F IS FOR FOOD WHICH I DIDNT GET TO HAVE U IS U MADE ME HUNGRY N IS FOR NO ONE LEFT TO SELL ME FOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!"

"After Taco Bell, I go to where I had seen MJ before. I suspiciously check the men's clearance shoe department and notice some guy who looks like me start coming towards me. I run into PetSmart."

"The guy I had poured coffee on chased me outside. I quickly run inside Taco Bell and eat a quesalupa. Quite delicious. I then take an employees black coat and run into Kohls to escape the madman."

"I head here after my Michael Jackson hunt to calm my nerves. Instead, I order a Caramel Macchiato and see MJ in my coffee! I reach inside but burn my hand. I then pour it on some guys head but no MJ:("

""Michael Jackson is alive!" I yell to everyone. As I say this, he drops his wings and moon walks to the bathroom. When I run inside, he's disappeared. Was it even real? Of Course I say to the voices."