Joe Brown

"The new operators of Burdekin Bar DESTROYED the classic beauty of this place with their GARISH makeover. PATHETIC! DISGUSTING! CHEAP!"

"I wonder what time do the prostitutes next door go here for their Bikram sessions. Do they Bikram with the Sony executives and chichi locals?"

"Missing in La Espresso is the chubby yet "my hair is dyed in season" barista girl. Known for her fetish for oddly colored nails & punk attitude, she is said to be channeling Pink while making coffee."

"Il Espresso habitues misses the middle aged Greek persona who supervised this aroma central in 2008. He is known to personally deliver trays of canapes to hungry Sony creatives sealed with his smile!"

"The freshly squeezed juices made by the Curly Brazilian Barista rival the aroma of their plantation roasted coffee. A must try!"

"The new tables & chairs rivals the quality of those cheap bars in Bali! Class & elegance flew out of Burdekin after the renovation months ago. A shame! At least they retained the bronze ceiling."