Trippy Cordylus

"Even though the Japanese are world-renowned for being polite, don't make a stupid "Oh, I FOUND you!" joke at Nemo Sushi, unless you want to find yourself at the wrong end of a sashimi knife. Hi-yaaaa!"

"Don't try to trick the staff into believing you are Spencer Tunick. The ladies who work there are quite astute and the security guards have big black nightsticks."

"Ask for help before reaching for that $800 guitar on the wall. And don't make a joke that the subsequent avalanche reminded you of a Rube Goldberg machine. Oh, and don't drink beer in the piano room."

"If you crash a wedding at the Pavilion & drink the open bar dry, plan your exit before the last ferry (9:10 p.m.) Newcastle can seem pretty small when a party's out of booze & looking for you."

"Dutch food! Dutch food! Licorice (bulk food), cookies and cakes (in cookie section) and lots of Indonesian items for "rijst tafel""

"Never go to a theatre dressed like Abraham Lincoln. People will resent your tall hat and may want to assassinate you. (just now)"